Richard Benson

Another year, another set of exams and another round of well-meaning students to provide us with our textbook mix of wisdom and wisecracks. Bursting with…

'I need to work hard on my maths so I will be god at it.' 'My dads boss lives in a big hose.' 'When I…

What was Sir Isaac Newton famous for? He invented gravity. Another year has passed, which means more exams have been sat and more silly answers…

Have you always thought that a goldfish has a 3-second memory span? Do you think your morning coffee comes from a bean? Do you believe…

When you have endless exams to prepare for, the assignment you wrote has genuinely been eaten by the dog and you’re forced to wear the…

When your precious offspring have hijacked the car and there’s a hole in your wallet the size of the Grand Canyon, kick back and relax…

When the little angels are driving you crazy and you’re one minivan away from being a personal taxi service, these wonderful quips and quotes will…

Q: Define the term ‘antagonist’. A: Someone who tortures ants. Q: What are levees? A: Expensive jeans. Sharpen your pencils and have your rulers at…

'Never have children, only grandchildren.' Gore Vidal When your roses have been trampled by little feet and the golf has been hijacked by children's TV,…

'The older one grows, the more one likes indecency.' Virginia Woolf So you're getting on a bit, but even if your body creaks more than…

'Most grandmas have a touch of the scallywag.' Helen Thomson When there are sticky handprints on the sofa and you can't prise the darlings away…

'The away team were prevented from making a final strike due to a well-timed tickle' Laugh out loud at this selection of the funniest faux…

Exams have never been so hilarious! Banish the horror of school days with this bumper edition of the world’s best pupils. Bursting with misunderstandings, misspellings…

I threw the kitchen sink at him but he went to the bathroom and got his tub. Andy Roddick on Roger Federer When I lost…

'I wouldn’t say I was the best manager in the business. But I was in the top one.' Brian Clough Sport is the stuff of…

‘Ireland is where strange tales begin and happy endings are possible.’  Charles Haughey From classic favourites Oscar Wilde and W. B. Yeats to modern greats including Maeve Binchy and…

'One hates an author that’s all author.' Lord Byron With quips, quotes and insults from beloved literary figures such as William Shakespeare, Virginia Woolf and Ernest Hemingway…

With quips, quotes and insults from classic favourites William Shakespeare and Jane Austen to modern humorists Stephen Fry and Billy Connolly, this delightful book will ensure you’re never at a loss for the perfect witticism.

‘… you won’t know whether to laugh or cry’ DAILY MAIL  Getting up at the crack of dawn, wearing school uniform, squabbles in the schoolyard,…

We all know that the written word is full of traps for the unwary, and this goes double for those in their early years of…

Ahh, glorious school days… It’s no wonder they went so quickly with all the exams, the classroom fun, the sticky situations to get out of,…

If you don’t know a cold war from a cold sore, then take comfort in this cracking, all-new, fun-size dose of F in Exams, containing…

If the thought of science exams conjures up the memory of singeing your eyebrow on a Bunsen burner, then take comfort in this cracking, all-new,…

If you get perspiration and precipitation confused, then take comfort in this hilarious, all-new, fun-size dose of F in Exams, containing some of the most…

The F in Exams are over, the results are in and just when you thought it was safe to go back in the classroom… BANG!…

'The away team were prevented from making a final strike due to a well-timed tickle' 'British Left Waffles on Falkland Islands' Laugh out loud at…

'Being powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you aren't' Margaret Thatcher, UK prime minister 1979-1990 and leader…

The world is a confusing place, especially for children, and their innocent observations and questions can be side-splittingly hilarious. They can also be a tiny…

'Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope' Bill Cosby 'My father had a profound influence on me, he was a lunatic' Spike…

When the little angels are driving you crazy and you're one minivan away from being a personal taxi service, these wonderful quips and quotes are…

Jack brort a cak to school and we all had a pis Captin Cok was a famos exploder I found a spare seal so I…

Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty? A: He says goodbye to childhood and enters adultery. Q: How can you prevent milk…

This book is designed to help you in many ways. While its main objective is to save you money, precisely how much you wish to…