Search Results for: Gift and Humour

‘You may not realise it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you’ – Walt Disney.
Ever had one of those days when it felt like the whole world was conspiring against you? So what if you’ve just wrapped your new car round a lamp post, emailed your personal snaps to the entire company by mistake or delivered a eulogy with your flies undone: s**t happens get over it! Here is a book packed with quotations to help you see the funny side.

If you thought there was only one type of fart, get ready to be blown away!

Like a beautiful snowflake, every fart is unique. From the ever-so-dainty Pipsqueak to the mighty window-frame-rattling Thunderclap, there’s a whole world of bottom-burps to savour in this informative and revealing dictionary, along with a plethora of butt-trumpet facts. Ranging from how to fart and get away with it to the worst places to fart, you’ll realise you didn’t know the first thing about flatulence!

The hilarious Sunday Times bestseller! Reached number 5 in the paperback non-fiction chart – sadly not number 2!

Get fit while you sh*t with this rather amusing and slightly silly parody of the HIIT workout phenomenon

This is for the multitaskers, the toilet-lovers, the bottom-tooters, the widdlers, the toilet-paper origamists – yes, I’m talking to you! You thought there would never be an exercise regime that you could enjoy in the comfort of the smallest room, but here it is: The SHIIT Workout. It even has pictures and planners to log your workouts.

Getting into shape has never been more fun, as you go through the (bowel) motions from jumping jacksies and push-outs to bottom burpees and skidders.

This is the essential guide to getting fit while you SHIIT.

Just make sure you have plenty of toilet roll handy as it’s going to get messy – you’re going to do more than sweat.

Jack brort a cak to school and we all had a pis

Captin Cok was a famos exploder

I found a spare seal so I quickly sat on it

Children are at their funniest when they are trying to be serious, and their earnest attempts at mastering the English language are a veritable goldmine of unintentional humour, from the charming to the ludicrous, and from the profound to the downright X-rated. Enjoy this side-splitting collection of spelling slip-ups and homework howlers.

You’ve created a human alarm clock without a snooze button!

Welcome to the life-upending, sleep-thieving, crazy old business known as parenthood. The hours are long and the pay is non-existent, but the rewards are priceless. They better be.

You’re in for quite a ride, but this hilarious gift book is here to tell it like it is, respect the struggle and help you see the funny side. A blend of real talk, hard-won wisdom and relatable observations, this is the perfect antidote to all those well-meaning myths about the unbelievable journey that you and your little one have just begun.

The realizations that are going to dawn on you pretty fast include:

– Just think, in a couple of years that little angel will be calling you a poo-head.
– Despite all the boundaries you set, sometimes you are going to have to let the baby win.
– Your biggest daily achievement is now getting another human to burp.
This is the perfect gift for anyone with a new baby and a sense of humour.

Ahh, glorious school days… It’s no wonder they went so quickly with all the exams, the classroom fun, the sticky situations to get out of, the work to avoid and the teachers to annoy. Enjoy this new collection of hilarious exam answers, along with schoolyard jokes, amusing doodles, silly excuses, spelling slip-ups and loads more!

The F in Exams are over, the results are in and just when you thought it was safe to go back in the classroom… BANG! It’s time for F in Retakes!



Enjoy another heady dose of hilarious answers that canny students have given to the trickiest exam questions.

‘What would you be if you weren’t Irish?’ asked the barman.


Pat replied, ‘Ashamed!’


There are two types of people in this world: the Irish, and those who wish they were. But wherever you’re from, The Little Book of Irish Jokes is packed with grand gags and Celtic wisecracks that will give you the gift of the gab and a belly full of laughs.

Child: Dad, I’m hungry
Dad: Hello hungry, I’m Dad!
Celebrate the sense of humour that’s so bad it’s great with this ultimate collection of dad jokes. From cheesy one-liners to puns so terrible that they should probably be illegal, this book has it all – it’s sure to make you laugh and cry.

This hilarious instruction book is here to help you accept that being a cat parent is not a choice, but a lifestyle

Your cat rules your home and your heart. You bend over backwards to cater to their quirks. In fact, you would do anything for your pampered puss. So why is it that they sometimes choose to ignore you, push your most prized possessions off shelves, or use your furniture as a scratching post?

Luckily, this no-nonsense survival guide is on hand to help you navigate feline parenthood. Whether you need to learn not to take the cold shoulder personally, how to accept those little “gifts” with due gratitude, or simply to understand that there is never an acceptable excuse for an empty food bowl, these pearls of wisdom are sure to make you an elite cat parent in no time.

Filled with original illustrations and tongue-in-cheek advice, this sneak peek into the mind of the mundane moggy will make the perfect gift for any cat lover.

‘The older one grows, the more one likes indecency.’
Virginia Woolf

So you’re getting on a bit, but even if your body creaks more than it used to, you’ve still got your sense of humour. This collection of witty quotations and gems of senior sagacity will keep a spring in your step and the cobwebs at bay.

Are you a clueless romantic? Do you stumble over every compliment you offer your loved one? Let’s be honest: you need to stop trying to be the dreamy, passionate lover you desire to be – it’ll never work.

This book, packed with tongue-in-cheek quips and endearingly honest declarations of lukewarm love, is right up your street and the perfect gift to give to your other half (instead of that beautiful bouquet they’ll be expecting).

If you’ve stopped finding the ‘hide the pencils’ routine funny, or just need some wicked inspiration for staving off office boredom, these dares are guaranteed to have you gasping with delight and cackling in anticipation as you:

• Arrive at work in your dressing gown, holding a bowl of cornflakes
• Book a male stripper for the office on Friday afternoon
• Create a mini aquarium in the water cooler
• Communicate with everyone through the medium of dance for the day

With 400 outrageous dares to help release your inner delinquent and challenge your nerve to the limit, the question is: Do you dare to play?

Pamper someone you love with this sweet book of vouchers containing romantic gestures, from breakfast in bed to a dreamy weekend away – it’s the gift that keeps on giving!

It’s the best of times and the worst of times. You’re welcoming a new addition to the family, but you’re now officially old. You’re also an eternal babysitter. On the plus side, you can enjoy spoiling the little darlings rotten and hand them back at the end of the day before the nappies start overflowing.

This outrageous book of cute cartoon creatures boasting larger-than-life proportions is guaranteed to make you guffaw.

A unique and inexcusable glimpse of nature’s lesser-known creations, this menagerie will show you a side of the animal kingdom you’ll find it hard to forget.

Ever been lost for words abroad?

When you want to get your point across abroad there’s only one way to do it: by swearing your ar*e off! Impress the world with a stream of multi-lingual profanity from this nifty pocket book.

Did you hear about…
The Tennessee student who jumped into a laundry chute that was actually a trash compactor?
The Swiss statesman butchered by an axe-wielding bear?
The ancient Greek playwright struck by a tortoise falling from the sky?
Over the ages, death has come in some very unpredictable forms. This irreverent little book gathers together some of the most peculiar and outrageous ways that people across the globe have met their untimely ends. Whether shocking or silly, these true stories are proof at least that the grim reaper has a strange sense of humour.

A titillating book of 32 sexy vouchers for lovers to get you both hot under the collar!

Provoke squeals of delight from your amour with this deliciously naughty book of vouchers containing saucy gestures and ideas, from a seductive massage to a lap dance.

If you’re looking for that special gift for your favourite someone for Valentine’s, a birthday, or “just because”, then look no further than this steamy selection of vouchers from the oh-so-cute to the downright dirty!

Why not offer to greet your lover with nothing but a smile or perhaps engage in a bit of al fresco friskiness? Maybe you’re a dinner-by-candlelight kind of couple… or is a seductive massage more your thing? Or how about talking dirty or joining the mile-high club?

Flirt the night away, get hot and heavy, and then come back for more!

It’s the gift that keeps on giving!

A hilarious, fully illustrated book full of tongue-in-cheek advice for surviving life as a cat parent – the perfect gift for any cat lover

You have the best cat in the world, it’s true. But there’s no avoiding the fact that, perfect and adorable as they may be, there are certain elements of being a cat owner that you could do without. Those thoughtful “gifts” you find in the kitchen. The scratch-marks on the couch. Their hairballs clogging up your vacuum cleaner.

Luckily, this no-nonsense guide is here to teach you all the tricks you’ll ever need to help you navigate life with your furry friend, so you can focus on the positives – like giving them head-scritches and cooing over their little toe beans.

With pearls of wisdom like these, you’ll be a pro cat parent in no time:

– As a cat parent, you will need to work out the golden number of tummy rubs your cat will allow before they turn into an uncontrollable scratch-monster
– Your cat may look cute and innocent, but there’s an evil mastermind secretly at work behind all that fluff
– Items placed on a surface are highly offensive to cats and will be quickly dispatched to the floor, where they belong

‘I need to work hard on my maths so I will be god at it.’

‘My dads boss lives in a big hose.’

‘When I am older I want to learn to drive a cat.’

Children are at their funniest when they’re trying to be serious, and their earnest attempts at mastering the English language are a goldmine of unintentional humour, from the charming to the ludicrous, and from the profound to the downright X-rated. Enjoy this bumper edition of side-splitting spelling slip-ups and hilarious homework howlers.

Another year, another set of exams and another round of well-meaning students to provide us with our textbook mix of wisdom and wisecracks.

Bursting with yet more crazy and creative thinking, this book showcases an all-new selection of test paper answers, from hilarious misunderstandings to breathtaking ingenuity.

I threw the kitchen sink at him but he went to the bathroom and got his tub.
Andy Roddick on Roger Federer
When I lost my decathlon world record I took it like a man. I only cried for ten hours.
Daley Thompson
I’ve seen George Foreman shadow boxing and the shadow won.
Muhammad Ali
Win, lose or draw, players and fans always have something to say about it. Packed to the rafters with the best quips and quotes from across the world of sport, this massive collection will keep you smiling in the stands even when you’re smarting from the scoreline.

My doctor asked me if I drank to excess. I told him I would drink to anything.
What is a bear’s favourite pasta? Tagliateddy.
How do snowmen get to work? By icicle.
If laughter is the best medicine, this colossal compendium is an overdose waiting to happen! With gags grouped into sections ranging from babies and birthdays to marriage and music, there’s something for everyone in these jest-packed pages. Side effects may include split sides and a sore jaw.